Opening my eyes

I just got back from Napa (my first trip), and it was amazing. So you'd probably think that I'd have pictures and fun details to share. I do...just not today. Today, I have some other insight into my life.

Lately, God's been opening my eyes to my sinfulness. He's showing me how I am judgmental, how I choose distraction over being with Him, how I wander from Him every time, how I am unfaithful.

For most of my life, I haven't felt like a sinner. I truly thought that I was loyal and faithful, open and honest, dedicated to Him, and I definitely didn't judge others. I knew I wasn't perfect, but I certainly was good enough. This was the lie that I was believing.

I have realized that I am a sinner. Romans 3:23 says, "for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." I will never be good enough when I'm compared to God. And He's diligently showing me this in small and big ways. He really is opening my eyes to my own sin, my own issues, to how I fall short of Him and His plan for me every day.

And yet, it is good news. He has forgiven me. He has covered my sin - my ugly, nasty sin - with His pure blood. But I still must choose to turn to Him, to follow Him. I must choose Him in each of those moments when I realize how gross I really am on my own. And He'll be there. He'll be the voice saying, "'This is the way, walk in it,' whenever I turn to the right or to the left" (Isaiah 30:21).

What has He been opening your eyes to lately?

Megan

Beautiful - a Saturday revelation

I was in a pre-institute meeting today for the National Writing Project. During the afternoon session, we participated in a teaching demonstration. My group got to read the book "Beautiful," a children's book, and work toward our own definition of beautiful.

On my way to the definition, I described the windows in my house as beautiful because they allow me to look out to the world. Through them, I am brought out of myself and into the world and creation. I called them beautiful because they draw you in without demanding your attention.

And I realized that I am much like a window - or I should be anyway. I should be the glass through which my neighbors, friends, and acquaintances see God. My relationship with Him should draw them in without demanding their attention so that their attention can rightly go to Him.

That's when I came to my definition of the word "beautiful." I think that something (or someone) is beautiful when it fulfills its purpose. Paintings are beautiful because they bring light, color, perspective, and joy to viewers, for which they are meant. Books are beautiful because they allow you to hear other people's stories (whether real or not) and find a fuller meaning out of life. I am beautiful when I come in close to Him and reveal His love by loving those around me.

I don't quite know how this looks, yet. I'm still praying through what it means and how I go about loving (relentlessly!) those around me. But, oh, how I want to be beautiful.

Where do you find beauty? Where do you find purpose?

Megan

Mantra

Love relentlessly.

These two words caught me tonight. As a follower of Christ, I am called to love relentlessly. But more often than not (way more often) I don't follow that way. Instead, I find myself thinking only about me. I find in myself a wholly self-centered attitude. The question running through the back of my mind is usually how will this benefit me?

Love relentlessly.

It keeps coming back. And I fall short each time because I can't even try hard enough to come close. My pastor said the other Sunday that when we get to a point of saying, "I can't do this by myself," then we're at a place where God can actually work in our lives. So that's where I am. On my own, I am not filled with love. I can't do this by myself. And yet, I am called...

Love relentlessly.

Which means there is a way. With Christ, it is possible to love relentlessly.

In love, Megan

Three unrelated things...

First to the important thing - what God's been teaching me. Lately, He's been really emphasizing the point in my life to draw near and lean into Him. Right now I'm in a time of waiting on Him which has been hard and painful and so rewarding at the same time. But as I wait, I have the tendency to want to get busy, and so I distract myself from the purpose He's called me to. But a few days ago He reminded me to be still and simply know that He is God.

And in that moment of surrender and letting go to go to Him, I remembered that He really is God. He is in control. He has a plan, and it's good. I don't have to worry about getting everything in the right place because He's already doing that. When I actually still my anxious heart and turn back to the one who created everything, I can breath easier because I know that He's working all things together for the good of us who believe.

The second thing is a smaller celebration. I started my first sewing project. It's an easy one to begin - just a simple hemming of our drapes. But I'm going to use the leftover scraps to make original window treatments for our small bedroom windows. I'll post a picture when I'm finished.

The third unrelated thing is this...
My African Violets are blooming and sparkling in an unbelievable way. Just when I'm so sick of winter I can hardly stand it, God gives a little piece of grace and beauty.

Now, to you. What has God been teaching you lately? Has He drawn you into a new place in Him? What are you celebrating right now - big or little? What's one thing that surprised you this week in a lovely way?

Allow yourself to be swept away by the beauty of truth and creation.

Megan